Caregiving with a Chronic Condition … some helpful advice.
If you have a chronic condition, then it is possible that at some point during your illness, you may be put in the position of being a caregiver. This may be especially true if you are not working and are the only one available to help. Or, like in my case, the one in need of care is your spouse, parent, or child.
Recently, my husband experienced a stroke. He is in very good physical shape and health, so this took us by surprise. We were very fortunate to catch it early and get him to the hospital quickly, but the stroke did leave him with partial paralysis on his left side. He was in the hospital for a week and just returned home a few days ago.
He is receiving physio and occupational therapy, but he has to use a walker and needs support with most of his personal needs. A simple shower has turned into an exhausting task. He also has rehabilitation exercises to do several times a day, and I work with him to do that.
I have Central Sensitivity Disorder, and as a result, I experience a myriad of chronic conditions such as fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue, irritable larynx syndrome, and multiple chemical sensitivities. I’ve written an article about this condition here. So, when I was called up to the plate to support my husband during this crisis, my own personal care needs were at risk of being neglected.
This is why I chose to write this article because I can say from experience…this does not need to happen! I realized that in order to be the best support I could be, I had to make sure to take good care of myself. This does not mean that I haven’t experienced extreme fatigue, stress, and anxiety, but I had tools available to me to help support myself during this time. I want to share with you some of this information, so you too can take care of yourself if you are put in the position of caregiving with a chronic condition.
Take good care of yourself!
Use EFT Tapping to manage your stress and anxiety during the situation. I am a certified EFT Practitioner, so I know it well. I am using this tool on a regular basis and it has been a huge support. If you are not familiar with EFT, then I recommend The Tapping Solution, by Nick Ortner.
Practice the Daily Energy Routine by Donna Eden. This has been very supportive of my energy system. Her book, Energy Medicine, is a great resource as well. I’ve been using some energy healing tools on my husband during his rehabilitation. It is also important to practice grounding and I have a good meditation here for that here.
Get good quality sleep, and if that means asking your doctor for a sleep aid, then do it. This will just be temporary. Use guided meditations to help with relaxation, stress, and anxiety. I have a nice one here on my YouTube channel. Check with your doctor or naturopath about taking vitamin B or other supplements to help support your nervous system.
Eat nourishing food. It is so tempting and easy to reach for unhealthy comfort foods, and I did do that on occasion because I was just so exhausted, but to the best of your ability, feed your body well. I found the comfort foods actually made me feel worse, so it wasn’t worth it in the end.
And this one is quite important…don’t take on too much care with your loved one. Allow, and encourage them to do as much as they possibly can, even if it is difficult for them. They need to feel empowered to take care of themselves, and this helps with their rehabilitation.
I have noticed that individuals with chronic conditions also tend to have something I call ‘Helperitis’, meaning they help others at the expense of their own health. This often leads to burnout and worsening of their symptoms. I wrote an article about that here.
Take some time for yourself each day! Go for a walk, do a bit of yoga, have a nice bath with aromatic bath salts, read a book, or perhaps journal. All these activities are nurturing, and during such a challenging time, it is so important to practice self-care. Caregiving with a chronic condition can be exhausting, so do what you can to rest and refresh yourself.
Ask for help!
Start with family, friends and neighbors. My mom arranged a cleaning lady for us and our neighbors installed a handrail at the front door for my husband. Ask for ready-made meals and help with errands. See what services your community has to offer. Where we live, we have Geriatric Specialty Services and outpatient support services. I am utilizing everything that is available!
Order groceries on-line and use home delivery services. I was very fortunate that we had just filled the freezer with soups and stews, so I have a good supply of ready-made meals.
Talk to just one or two friends or family members and have them communicate with everyone else. You don’t have to tell the story of what happened or update how your loved one is doing to everyone you know. Have one or two contacts only, and let them do that for you.
Delegate any tasks or work you can. This may include hiring help such as a gardener or cleaning person, having the neighbor cut your grass and or water the garden…don’t try to be a hero…ask for help.
And most importantly, traumatic events can create so much stress, anxiety, and fear. The emotional toll can be significant, so make sure to seek emotional support if needed. Even if this is just a friend’s shoulder to cry on or seeing a therapist…ask for help!
Aside from those resources I’ve offered above, I have created a guided meditation and visualization for stroke recovery to help my husband with his healing process. I knew from studying the work of Dr. Joe Dispenza, that visualization can be a powerful tool to help build new neuropathways, so while he was immobile, this was something he could do. This meditation would be beneficial to anyone dealing with a stroke injury, so I did upload it to my YouTube channel even though this doesn’t directly support you as a caregiver. Maybe you know someone who would benefit from it!
Check out my Guided Meditation Playlist on YouTube for an assortment of guided meditations. You may find other meditations that can support you in your life. Caregiving with a chronic condition can pose a variety of challenges and I have several articles on my blog related to healing and self-care, so you can check that out.
My husband is doing well and is recovering more quickly than expected. His health care team is quite impressed with his improvement. I believe his underlying good health, our healthy lifestyle, our knowledge about alternative healing modalities, our faith, and his state of mind, have all been contributing factors. He calls his walker ‘Johnny Walker’ and pretends to do ‘wheelies’ with it. We laugh a lot and are so very grateful for every moment we have together. The sound of him moving about in his walker while I’m having a relaxing bath makes my heart flutter. Life is good!
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